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Dear Team,

We are excited to announce that the company is moving in a bold new direction and pivoting toward promising opportunities in agentic sheep herding.

However, we have made the difficult but necessary decision to pursue workforce optimization.

As a result of these changes, today will be your last day at Momentumly, which is also the exciting new name of our company that you should be proud to call yourself an alumni of.

At the end of the day, this is not about numbers. It’s about people. And I sincerely deeply cherish all of you.

We recognize that transitions like this can create feelings of soul-crushing existential dread, and we are committed to supporting you through this next chapter with the Jelly of the Month Club for the next 7 days. You can also use my discount code ROBOT for 10% off new notebooks at Blank Bestsellers.

Sincerely,
The Office of the CEO